Denominator

Here we go again

another failure 

I'm so tired of fighting 

look where it's gotten me

on the losing end

hurting the ones I love

and hurting myself

so many nights I cried

praying to be normal 

whatever normal is

I had a plan 

but I always have a plan

and I never tell anyone

until I'm ready to execute it

that's always my mistake

I either say the right things

at the wrong times

or I say nothing at all

now I have so much to say

the truth is painful

maybe it's what I deserve

history tells us 

those who don't learn 

are doomed to repeat it

when you learn nothing

you lose everything

so when will I learn

because it's always me

never anyone else

I'm so tired of fighting 

beating myself up so badly

that I can barely stand

© 2020

L.O.V.E. Notes: Memory

It's been months
since I've seen her
and it hurts 
but what hurts more
is knowing that
she won't remember
who I am to her
for twenty-five years 
she raised me
took me everywhere
and showed me
what it meant to love
but it hurts to know
I'm just a memory
she no longer has
being forgotten hurts
especially when 
you're unable to forget
that's been my entire life
with the ones I love
and it makes me sad
but I'm grateful
for the memories
grateful for the time
she gave me
it was her choice
but she made it 
her responsibility
when she didn't have to
now it's my responsibility 
to hold on to the 
memories for us both

<3

© 2020